I spent my winter break in the constant motion to which I am most accustomed. Perhaps even more familiar though less inherently comfortable, I traveled by planes, trains, and automobiles with my family. Actually, that’s a lie. We didn’t take the train. We’re American. Nobody takes the train here.

We did our usual Sweeney tornado of the mid-west to visit/terrorize my parents’ families. Then we decided to go to Florida. And the only thing worse than chlamydia is Florida. Lion and I may or may not have watched Easy A non-stop since we returned to being still.

Our trip to Florida was made on behalf of my mother’s doctoral program. Thus, we did not go to one of the excellent and warm places that east-coasters go to die. We went to Jacksonville. My mother tried to pass this off as a vacation. It was, in fact, a sort of last hurrah for her efforts to drag us along on errands. Now that we’re all older and though not entirely self-sufficient (see also: me) we can evade tag-along status for the one errand that turns into six and the next thing you know you’re passed out in the back of the car covered in whatever sugar-packed item was purchased to silence you.

BUT IT’S THE HOLIDAYS! And so we all had to go to Jacksonville, where it was a balmy fifty-something degrees for the duration of our trip. My mom was able to get us one last time. And she’ll probably do it again. Because she’s a trickster, that mother of mine.

For now, though, I’m back to something vaguely resembling business-as-usual. Whatever that even means now. I’m really not sure. I’m supposed to work tomorrow, but there’s a good chance it’ll start snowing in a couple hours, which will cancel schools here because one of the few things I have in common with the people of Jefferson City is a general inability to function when cold things fall from the sky. Seriously. Why is this a source of joy for so many people? Do you all like hypothermia? I don’t. I like the sun.

Given the possibility that I will not actually be working tomorrow, I am working on my writing sample for my grad school applications. Supposedly. I am mostly just reminding myself of my grade-A procrastination skills. I really wish I could list that as a “special skill” on my resume.

Nicole Sweeney
Special Skills: Procrastinating, Sporcle Geography games, and quoting teen comedies

Other Noteworthy Attributes: proud owner of many fantastic false eyelashes and an extensive collection of sequined clothing. see also: drag queen

Dear graduate schools:

Attached you will not find the writing sample you have requested, nor does my resume reflect the polished and grossly exaggerated career history of my fellow applicants. Instead, please find a list of reasons why I will be more fun to have on campus than anyone else. I feel that my particular skills and noteworthy attributes will significantly enhance the quality of life for your entire faculty. And student body. Please pick me.

Sincerely,
Nicole.

But seriously. Seriously. I had so many things happen in the last couple weeks that made me think, “This could be an excellent blog post.” And then I just forgot. And then there’s the alarming state of my Google Reader.

My continued ineptitude with the entire concept of “adulthood” might explain the fact that at 22, I am still being dragged along on my mommy’s errands. I would try to formulate some sort of New Year’s Resolution out of this, but I think we all know that adulthood is still way out of my reach. And that sounds startlingly close to productive. Not actually productive, because our New Year’s resolutions are just promises we know we’re going to break. But that at least involves the facade of productivity, which is too productive.

And maybe I’m secretly praying for snow like all of the other children. Don’t tell. I’ll deny it if you do.